Thankful

I can't let another day go without writing down what I'm thankful for this year.

I'm thankful for modern medicine which has given us the word "remission" and time with our sweet Presley. 30 years ago, parents were only given 10-30% survival rate. Today children with cancer are given 80% and we were given 90% That is something to be very grateful for this year. Yes, its a love/ hate, putting poison in your child is hard but it also saves lives. I'm thankful that I could hug and kiss my sweet little girl. I know too many families who would give everything for just one more kiss or hug.

I'm thankful for family and friends who have given of time and money to help us in our trials and who have supported us. You know who you are ! We could not do it without you! Those that don't ask but just do! Thanks so much. 

Day 29 is a day I will forever be grateful for. I can still in my mind picture where I was sitting when on the other line Doc Fluchel read the results for the bone marrow aspirate and said "remission", no traceable amounts of leukemia left. I was sitting in the second room of this tiny apartment playing a game with my daughter who could not walk from the steroids. Her cheeks were so full and round but a smile was on her face. We shouted "Take that, Cancer"!

I'm thankful for the tender mercies and blessing among the trials we face. I'm reminded of a loving Heavenly Father who lifts you and carries you when times are too hard to walk along. My Savior has not left me alone or comfortless. I'm thankful for my faith and my knowledge that families can live together forever. I'm thankful for that simple four letter word HOPE. Hope gives us so much to hold on to.

Im thankful for Paul and his continued support and love for each of us. He is the only rock. Yes he has hard days but he holds us all together. Daddy is quick responder with the puck bag, the ER visits and so much more. 

Im so thankful for Crew. He has had a hard year. He sees all the attention put on Presley and still stands strong. We love him and know his life too will be blessed for his support and love for his sister. 

Im thankful for a club I belong to called "cancer moms". I know amazing woman. I could not do this without those cancer moms. 

This time of year causes many to reflect and to be grateful. I am by nature a positive happy person. I like to write and think and hope for the good times. Allowing my self to reflect on the trials also helps us to see the growth and change we make toward being better people. Without the bad we don't appreciate the good. Trials give us those life lessons to be able to have more compassion, more aware of the suffering around us, less judgmental, our compassion is stronger and we found that placing blame on others is a silly thing. Our love is stronger.
Feeling numb makes you not want to be thankful or reflective but I have forced myself out of the self medicated numbness to try to have feelings and be able to feel emotions for a few days. I'm thankful for that.